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Monday, August 31, 2009

Flower Power

Cheap, piece of junk, fugly, cardboard leather saddles from India. Now in FLORAL TOOLING.

Groovy huh?

Friday, August 28, 2009

Saddle Quality FAIL

Wow, could this thing BE more craptacular? It looks like it is made of paper and cardboard. I wouldn't trust this thing to hold up long enough to get it on the horse, much less survive having a rider on it. I can't believe people will buy stuff like this, or that someone would use this photo to attempt to sell this saddle.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Flame On!

Oh. My. God.

I realize this is supposed to be a trophy, I get that. However, were I awarded this I think I might burst out laughing, or crying, or perhaps even run screaming. I know my horse would spook and flee in terror if I came at her with this. This is a ROPING saddle, so in theory, is most likely going to be awarded to a cowBOY. Fringe? Really? Painted flames? Rhinestones? Holy cow, it's a saddle folks, not a low rider. Can you imagine hanging a spur in those fringes when trying to dismount?

Heck, I don't think (no, I KNOW) I would even display this as a trophy and not use it. I think I would give it back, or ask for a less frightful replacement.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Scary Pink Saddle of the Week

*SQUEEE!* Sparklies!

No, I will NEVER run out of fodder for this weekly feature. NEVER. Scary, isn't it?

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Torture Device Tuesday

For today's edition, I am turning once again to the TWH world. This particular bit has 10 inch shanks and a gag mouthpiece. It comes in a variety of mouthpieces as well, you can choose from; small twisted wire, tiny sweet iron twisted wire, twisted wire, chain or small smooth mouth. Depending on how badly you want to cut your horse's tongue up. Again, I am amazed at the variety of ways people can invent torture your horse. I am sure these feel great with some great huge lump of a person hanging on to the shanks for dear life.

Monday, August 24, 2009

I do not like it...

Sam I am, I do not like green...saddles?

Gross. This is one of the variations of the taxicab yellow saddle from last week. It apparently comes in Pseudomonas aeruginosa green as well. My only question is, does it smell like it too?

Friday, August 21, 2009

Stirrup Attachment FAIL

Here we have yet ANOTHER stirrup attachment fail. Really? How difficult is this? This pic is from a saddle sales site with multiple other cheap piece of crap western saddles on it. Did we not notice something wrong here? This is a bit obvious folks.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Bunny Fur Fiascos

Today I have some accessories with a bit of a bunny fur issue. The first is a set of headstall and breastcollar that sports trim made of zebra print rabbit fur. Oh, and it has the requisite pink rhinestone encrusted conchos. This is perfectly hideous, not to mention it would be hard to keep unmatted and clean. Bunny fur is a booger to keep looking nice and fluffy.

Next we have a fuzzy leopard print English saddle pad with black bunny fur trim around the edges. It also has a leopard print concho thingie with a gold tassel on it.

Now, I will admit a certain amount of attraction to this. I kind of like it in fact, especially if you removed the silly looking tassel thing. I am not a "fur is murder, OMG you can't kill the poor little fluffy animals" type person, not to mention my somewhat questionable attraction to leopard print. My favorite winter hat is trimmed with coyote fur and my favorite winter boots have bunny fur on them. So, I am not morally offended by this saddle pad, I just question the practicality of it. I know that horse sweat is difficult to get off of THEIR hair, and I know bunny fur is MUCH softer and fluffier than horse hair. It stands to reason that this stuff would be absolute hell to clean.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Scary Pink Saddle of the Week

Once again, it is time for your weekly dose of Pepto. Today we have an English one, this time in a lovely hot pink with a black seat and black piping all around. Blech

See, not all Tacky Tack is Western. The site said it is a synthetic, so at least it isn't crappy cardboard leather dyed with Pepto Bismol. Still, yuck.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Torture Device Tuesday

Today I have a bit that I had thought extinct, a relic of a more barbaric practice of "controlling" horses. The bit that I speak of is commonly known as a "Spanish" ring bit. Now, this is not a ring snaffle we are talking about here, this is a style of bit that was used from the middle ages up through Spanish Colonial times and into the 20th Century. Here is an illustration of a 16th century piece.

Here is an extant piece from the Spanish colonial era...

Bits like this were created to control war stallions, they exert huge amounts of leverage and can literally crush a horse's jaw if used with a heavy hand. For those who are unfamiliar with the way one of these functions, let me explain. The bit is placed in the horses mouth with ring encircling the lower jaw in place of a curb chain. I always thought them a relic of a bygone age, but alas, as with so many things in the horse world, I found that these things are still being made and used. These photos were sent to me by a reader, the bit pictured was (currently SOLD OUT, is that not disturbing?) available for purchase and can be ordered custom made to your specs.

Not only is it not a particularly well made piece, but it lacks the graceful lines and the tongue relief (however small) that the antique pieces offer. It is an ugly piece of work no matter how you look at it. It makes me sad because I KNOW that there are yahoos out there using this thing improperly.

Monday, August 17, 2009


Today we have a lovely saddle sent to me by an intrepid reader. They actually sent several, but I am going to show them one at a time and thus prolong the torture!

Today's edition is a screaming taxicab yellow. It seems to be embossed with some sort of floral pattern and something about it just screams "junk" to me. Perhaps it is the leather or perhaps the construction. At any rate, it is just horrendous.

Friday, August 14, 2009

Kimberwicke FAIL

A reader sent me this pic, it is a total FAIL. The bit is on COMPLETELY upside down. Now, I know it isn't THAT hard to look at a picture and see that that is not how they go. I also question the eyesight and competence of the judges and other competitors seeing as how apparently no one noticed it or brought it to the riders attention. The horse looks absolutely THRILLED too.

Sigh, there is no end to it is there?

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Painful Purple

Wow, this sure is, um, shiny. Lots of rhinestones, black ostrich, and METALLIC purple leather accents. Though a well made saddle overall, the combination of all of these embellishments is a bit overkill. I also don't like the black and metallic purple combo. If it were all black, it might be a bit more tolerable but as it is, it is just painful to look at. The little purple $ sign just makes the whole saddle doesn't it?

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Scary Pink Saddle of the Week

Here is our weekly entry in the Scary Pink Saddle of the Week. It is a synthetic, in a screaming neon pink with matching blanket AND girth. Think they need to do something about that rear billet too. Yikes.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Torture Device Tuesday

Now, I don't know for sure, but this fellow does not look too comfortable. I know very little about harness racing, but this sure looks like a lot of hardware on this guy. I can see that the blinders are operated on pulleys so they can be engaged or disengaged according to the situation. I get that, really. But I cannot for the life of me figure out what all that hardware in his mouth is meant to do. Anyone care to explain for the rest of the class?

Monday, August 10, 2009

Tacky Birthday

Hi all! Today I really don' t have a normal post, it is my birthday and I am taking off to enjoy a day in Hot Springs, AR. Here is a little photo for you to enjoy, a string of birthday ponies!

Friday, August 7, 2009

Stirrup Placement FAIL

Here is this week's Friday FAIL. Someone needs to have a good look at where stirrups are supposed to go on a saddle. I think we are a bit confused here.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

I Thought Better of Abetta...

...until now.

Found these while perusing the internet. I thought the point of a synthetic was so that you DIDN'T have leather to clean or worry about, but apparently I was wrong.

Wow, we have fake GATOR print now.

OSTRICH PRINT!!! And it comes in LOTS of hideous colors too.

Ummm, why?

GHETTO-FLAUGE! Yikes, my eyes hurt.

Regular camo for the woodsy set.

Last but not least, leopard print. Sadly the least offensive of the lot (I admit a certain fondness for leopard print, much to hubby's dismay), I might would use this for a trail saddle.

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Scary Pink Saddle of the Week

Oh my, apparently this trend has reached the folks "down under" too. I'm sorry. Love those stirrups too by the way.

I really am just stunned.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Torture Device Tuesday

Wow, sometimes I wish (well, not really) there was a sport that had as many torturous bits as gaited breeds and speed event horses. I know they think I am singling them out, but really, I keep looking for bad bits and this is what Google spits up. I pick on the TWH show world just as much, and that's MY breed. I found yet another supplier of torture devices for your gaming horse. Here is the page that shows this bit with the available mouthpieces. You can get all of the ones on this page with a variety of painful options including "mule/saw mouth". Wow, overkill much? Also, would someone please explain how exactly this contraption is supposed to function to do anything but annoy the hell out of (and not to mention very possibly HURT) your horse?

Look! You can get it with a BARE bicycle chain noseband too!

Here are a few of the others they offer...

Another one with a bike chain nose and nice long shanks too, along with a skinny mouthpiece.

And all I can say is, "What the hell?!?"

Says it's a "plate bit" for a "mature horse". Mmmmkay.

Monday, August 3, 2009


Wow, this was sent to me by a reader that was as, to borrow a word from FHOTD, "aghasted" as I was upon viewing it. It is, I kid you not, a fully fabric covered EMBROIDERED saddle. It looks like someone got a bit trigger happy with the embroidery machine. While an intriguing concept for embellishment on synthetic saddles, I think this one is a classic example of overkill. The big red horse shoes really detract from the otherwise not too bad floral designs. The quality also looks less than stellar. See how uneven the seams are and how poorly balanced the saddle looks overall? I also especially like the unfinished edges where the horn emerges through the fabric. A classic example of "interesting concept, needs work."