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Thursday, December 31, 2009

"Show" Saddle

I am not sure exactly WHAT is is showing, besides infinite bad taste and poor quality. Love the "retro" look of the (I kid you not) buckstitching, and the overdone "silver" conchos and lacing. The leather looks to be of excellent *snork* quality as well. It also comes with matching accessories.



So, all in all, what is the WORST thing I have posted all year? The Tackiest of the Tacky, what do you guys think?

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Scary Pink Saddle of the Week

Wow, this is a real winner here folks. Black and pink and YIKES! And it comes with accessories, including a FREE PAD! I especially like the sparkly pink diamonds and edging around the skirts and fenders. I believe it is a synthetic, but am not sure.



Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Another "Miracle Cure" for your horse...

Yet another magic gadget to instantly train your horse to be calm and manageable. Sold for a small fortune, and just as easily made from some clothesline and some pulleys. It is a war bridle folks, no matter how you dress it up or how you advertise it. They have been in use for centuries, which by the way, does not make them the best solution. I don't understand why something like this is necessary, why not, *gasp* actually TRAIN your horse to behave on a lead line? Noooo, we can't do THAT, that might require us to actually spend some time working with him, and we just don't have time. We want an instant fix. Do you know how much damage something like this can do in the wrong hands?




Monday, December 28, 2009

I'm Back

I hope everyone had a great holiday! I like this 4 day weekend thing, I vote we keep it! Unfortunately, we did not have a white Christmas, we had a flooded one! We got nearly 10 inches of rain! There were flooded roads everywhere. I want some dang snow, someone please send some my way.

Anyway, back to the Tacky Tack!



Wow, nice. Undyed, unfinished leather with purple accents. Like the corner "plates" there. Real high quality there guys.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Scary Pink Saddle of the Week

There really is no end to it is there? The constant parade of horrible, Pepto colored, Barbie accessory looking, and nausea inducing saddles seems to be unending. While I admit, this one seems to be well made, that only goes so far toward redeeming this affront to all things tasteful in the horse world. It honestly looks like it has the pink stuff splashed on it. If I came towards any of my girls with this, I think they might just kill me and have done with it. Not only that, it would SO clash with The Gift Horse and the Silly Red Filly's coat color (dark red chestnut). It MIGHT look tolerable on the Large Black Filly, but again, death and destruction if I tried. WHY must we make stuff like this? It would be a nice saddle but for the color choice.



Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Turquoise Tuesday

For the most part, I wouldn't post this on here, especially if this were a costume made by an individual, but alas, it is not. This is a "bareback saddle" set offered by El Companero . It comes in a variety of colors and configurations, and they also offer saddlebags to match. Wow.


Monday, December 21, 2009

Checkers anyone?

My thanks to the reader that sent me this. To me the pattern almost seems to move of its own accord. Most unsettling, not to mention terribly Tacky.


Sunday, December 20, 2009

Question for those in the know...

This is off topic, but my dad is looking at a horse and I have some deep misgivings about it, even before seeing it myself. Dad has a high "ferret factor" as I like to call it (Ooh, shiny, I want it.). It is an 8 year old reining gelding who has competed fairly successfully. My issue is this, the people selling the horse have owned him for about a year and he has been out to pasture for several months. They told my dad that he has spurs in his hocks, that all reining horses have them, and if they make it past 6 without lameness issues, then they are fine (huh?). Dad rode him and said he was not lame, but then again, the horse has not been ridden in months. If he goes back into training, he could show up lame at any point. I told dad not to buy him without a full pre-purchase exam, and a set of hock x-rays. I am really hesitant for him to get this horse and have it come up lame when he starts riding it regularly. What do you guys think?

Friday, December 18, 2009

Sorry for not posting...

Been working on getting moved all day, haven't had time to come up with a post, sorry. Will be back on schedule on Monday.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

A Prickly Situation

Many thanks to the reader that sent me this. This is quite possibly one of the worst ideas I have ever seen. This person has had SPIKES added to this saddle and bridle. Now, I can just see trying to get on and off with that cantle full of spikes in my way. Ouch. And what happens if you have a bit of a rodeo? Landing on those would HURT. Yay, puncture wounds in the bum. Also, check out the bridle, what if your horse is a head rubber? He would impale you every time he wanted to be affectionate. Brilliant, absolutely brilliant.









Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Scary Pink Saddle of the Week

Wow, this color combination just really offends me for some reason. The bridle and breastcollar in no way match the saddle either. Yuck.


Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Torture Device Tuesday

A reader sent me this photo, apparently it was found on a sale ad advertising this horse as a kid's lesson horse. I am not sure I would want a child to ride a horse that needed this contraption in order to control it. It looks to me like Duct-Tape wrapped wire or cable and a rusty old chain mouth gag bit. Surely we could have found something a bit less, well, jury-rigged to put on the creature for a sale photo.



Just, damn. Really?

Monday, December 14, 2009

I Hate Monday

I know, I can do better, but hey, it's Monday and I am sleepy. So today I just have something weird looking, no glaring colors or sparklies. I have posted these before, they are two seat saddles, and they seem like a really bad idea to me. This can't possibly fit many horses comfortably. I am curious to know how they are made.



Friday, December 11, 2009

More retina searing, seizure inducing tack...

Wow, if you thought I couldn't top yesterday's painfully bright Tack....

NEENER! I can!

Please don protective eyewear...









GAH! Rainbow Bright attacks!

Thursday, December 10, 2009

AAAAH! My eyes!

WARNING: This post contains images that may permanently burn your retinas without proper eye protection.

Gah, where do people come up with this crap? Nylon with silver conchos and leather fringe? NEON green Nylon at that. Ouch, I need sunglasses. It just amazes me to no end that people actually buy and USE this stuff. Like, pay money for it, on purpose.








Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Scary Pink Accessories of the Week

Here are some lovely items to help dress up your pink ensemble. Something here for everyone!















Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Tastelessness to the "X"treme







No, you are NOT imagining things, that is EXACTLY what you think it is. Tasteless is a gross understatement. Now, I enjoy going to a strip club with a bunch of guys as much as the next girl (if you haven't, try it, it is hilarious to watch the guys), but I wouldn't put strippers on my horse's tack! Geez folks, really?

Monday, December 7, 2009

WINNERS!!

Wow guys, those were some awesome captions! You have no idea how difficult it was to choose! I have awarded 1st-3rd places. Here they are in order...



"For sale: 9hh German import, excellent conformation, kid-safe, great on trails. Rover is an easy keeper, doesn't need shoes, and has a very smooth walk/jog/lope. $10,000 with saddle included."

2nd From Aylisha

"If I see any screaming little girls ready to braid pink bows into my hair, I swear I will run away and join a wolf pack"

3rd From Barrelsaddle

Once again Trigger didn't show up for work on the movie set and Rin-Tin-Tin had to fill in....

So, if you are one of these three folks, drop me an email with your mailing address and I will send you a little something as a prize!
If you guys want to make this a regular thing, we can. I can do one like, once a month or something. Just let me know in the comments!

Here is your Tacky Tack for today as well...


Friday, December 4, 2009

Friday Funny - Caption this!

Here is a fun one for you guys. Come up with the best caption for this photo and I will send you a piece of original artwork!

Poor Rover looks absolutely thrilled doesn't he?



I will announce the winner on Monday, have a great weekend!!

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Speak for themselves..

You know, sometimes there are just things that need no explanation from me. Sometimes they speak (YELL) loudly enough for themselves.

Please don protective eyewear.







Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Scary Pink Saddle of the Week

Many thanks to the reader that sent me this. A pink, SUEDE "show" saddle, nice. Ye gods, what are these people THINKING? Who would buy this? Worse, who would USE it? I think were I a horse I would hightail it out of there as fast as my little hoofies could carry me.


Personal Update:
Feeling better about things every day. Looking foward to the new place and new life. Some of my friend's daughter is turing one year old today, I got her a pony! (Well, I got her a stuffed one she can sit on, but still, how awesome, it makes noise when you squeeze its ear. Wish they made them in adult size.)

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Tiger Tuesday

You know, without the red streak and the "cooter spot" this isn't a bad saddle. As is it looks a bit, um, odd.


Monday, November 30, 2009

A Monday Moron

You know, I understand the need to show a horse at his best when selling him, but really folks, it is not necessary or safe to do shit like this...




All I can say is, it's a good thing this fellow is so calm, or the helmetless moron on his back would have her brains spattered all over the road. And could we not find a bridle with out blinkers to ride him with?

Friday, November 27, 2009

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Thankful

There are many things I am thankful for, among them are...

My family, both the one I was born in to and the one I chose. Without everyone's support I could not have made it these past few weeks.

My horses, they provide comfort without asking anything in return.

All my friends here, you guys' support and encouragement has helped more than you know.

The fact that I know that all my family and friends will always be there for me when I need them.

And last, but not least, the fact that my horses will NEVER have to wear any of the crap posted on this blog!!
Just a photo of my newest Artist Resin "Midnight" by Petra Albeggar of Germany. Painted by myself, and now named ERS Storm Surge. (Hey, needed something to dress up the post LOL.)

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Revisit: Scary Pink Saddle of the Week

Remember the post a while back that was the Aussie saddle in screaming pink on a rather disgusted pony? Well, I searched and searched and finally found an actual picture of just the saddle. Here it is for your amusement...




Nice, isn't it? Wouldn't it look fab on a nice bright chestnut (gag).

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

TTOTD is Making It!!

Well guys, I am going to make it! I am strong, capable, independent, and I can do this dammit! I am actually getting excited about moving and starting living my life how I want to. I am looking forward to having less to take care of, being on my own time table, and doing things the way I want to. I have grand plans of eventually being able to board my mare nearby and even grander (slightly crazy) plans of learning to ride sidesaddle and showing her (that reminds me, I need a new helmet LOL). Anyone know of a good instructional book/videos for this little endeavor? There isn't anyone in the area that does sidesaddle, so I will be blundering along on my own here.


Anyway, ending the personal update, here is your daily installment of Tacky.






No, your eyes do not deceive you, it IS a purple English bridle.

Monday, November 23, 2009

Big Hairy Deal

You know, for the life of me, I can't see the appeal of the hair-on cowhide seat. That would be slick as snot and would shed all over your butt.












Friday, November 20, 2009

A bit of humor in light of my current situation...




Good Things About Husbands:

Husbands are less expensive to shoe. (Unless your horse is one of those lucky ones with hooves like rocks.)

Feeding a husband doesn't require anything that even mildly compares with the hassle of putting up hay. (Though they are a great deal more picky.)

A lame husband can still work. (In theory, though they will try to make you think they are DYING)

A husband with a belly-ache doesn't have to be walked. (But he will whine incessantly.)

Husbands don't try to scratch their heads on your back. (No, just other things.)

They're better able to understand puns. (Most of the time.)

If they're playing hard to catch you *may* be able to run them down on foot. (No, because they can run faster scared than you can mad.)

They know their name. (Though they have selective hearing.)

They pay their own bills. (Actually, no they don't.)

They apologize when they step on your toes. (Most of the time.)

They seldom refuse to get in the vehicle. (Wellllll, depends on if they know you are going to the mall or not.)

They don't panic, yelling and running all through the house when you leave them alone. (unless you left the kids too)

For a nominal fee you can hire someone else to clip them. (Unless they have a deep fear of the clippers.)

Men rarely pee in the middle of the bed day in and day out. (True, but they sometimes have issues aiming at the toilet.)

Men don't usually trample their dinner into their beds, or eat the bedding. (No, but they do get crumbs everywhere.)

You don't have to bolt the door every time you leave them for a few minutes
to stop them running back to their friends. (Also depends on just WHAT their friends are doing.)


The Horse's Advantage:


If they don't work out you can sell them.

They don't come with in-laws.

If they don't behave you can castrate them.

You don't have to worry about your children looking like them.

You never have to iron their saddle pads.

If you get too fat for one you can shop for a bigger one.

They smell good when they sweat.

You can repair their "clothes" with duct tape.

It's possible to keep them from "jumping the fence".

You can force them to stay in good physical condition...with a whip if necessary.

They don't want their turn at the computer.

They turn white with age, but not bald.

They learn to accept restraint.

They don't care what you look like, as long as you have a carrot.

Your horse will not think a new pair of shoes every month is excessive

Your horse will be glad of the company if you go shopping for another one, and your friends will approve of you keeping more than one, as this is more natural.

You know, I think I may stick to my horse!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Try to figure this one out...

Advertised as a rare white English show saddle. Ummm, I am not terribly sure that that is an accurate description. Any ideas? Other than WTF?



Wednesday, November 18, 2009

TTOTD Has a new home...

Found a NICE apartment in a NICE area only 2 miles from work! No more driving nearly 40 miles round trip! It has an indoor and outdoor pool (that I don't have to maintain), a 24 hour fitness center, expansive grounds, a stocked pond, tennis courts, covered parking and my apartment has a fireplace and lots of storage and a patio! I will also be fairly close to several boarding facilities if I can swing it for my mare (she is currently on my parent's farm). They allow pets, so I can bring my service dog and 2 cats too. The catch is, I have to wait till Dec. 19 to move as they are currently renovating my apartment so I will have new everything.



Anyway, back to your regularly scheduled Tackiness...
EEEK! Big scary metallic fringies!!

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

What the hell is THIS?

I ran across this while tooling around online. It is supposedly a reproduction/reinvention of Renaissance era classical dressage bits. I think it is just a bit much myself. Do the shanks REALLY need to be that long? I admit, it's neat looking, but it still seems a bit much to me.


Still doing better, had counseling last night, going back in a week. Starting to get things packed up and beginning the search for a new place. Wish me luck, you can never tell exactly what a place will be like from photos online, they look fab in the pics, then when you get there, there are broken down cars, loitering people, and trash everywhere. You just never know...